Almost Everything
by Otomefeels
Summary: A story with Jan divided into smaller parts.
1. Snowflakes part 1

The sound of footsteps roamed through the empty hallways, pushing away the soft silence of the night. Light from the lampposts outside fell onto the stone floor from the big windows, casting its soft light on the otherwise dark hallways. It was past curfew and I was well aware of it. I glanced at the watch on my wrist and cursed beneath my breath. It wasn't supposed to be this late! The previously decision about going back to the work room seemed to have taken a turn for the worse, as the chance of being caught was getting bigger by each second.

I sighed exhausted, if I had been better at it, I would have been back in my room hours ago. But if I hadn't gone, then I wouldn't have finished the present. Even if it was just a small thing, I wanted to give it to him on Christmas day.

I slowed down before my hand found the cold door handle, but before I could press it down, it opened on its own, easily vanishing from my hand. My eyes went up, startled by the sudden movement, and my stomach turned into a knot. I held my breath, closed my eyes and prepared myself mentally for what was bound to happen in seconds.

The door creaked softly and the person took at sharp breath.

''Lena?''

Surprised by the sudden use of my name, my eyes opened and met the eyes that belonged to the man I really didn't wanted to see. I quickly hid my hands behind my back, desperately hoping that he hadn't noticed the bag with the present in it.

''Jan… What are you doing out so late?'' I finally spoke, nervously fidgeting with the bag behind my back. He smiled softly, like he always did, and my heart sped up. Almost instantly, my body relaxed and I sighed softly.

''I was making sure all of the lights were turned off.'' He smiled while speaking and my eyes quickly looked down the hallway he came from. Everything was already dark and why would he be doing that so late? My eyes found his again and I couldn't help but wonder. ''But why are you out here so late? You must know that it's past your curfew.''

_Hurry… Lie. Come on, say something…_

I swallowed hard, no words formed in my head and my mouth opened but merely closed again seconds later. My body tensed up once again and my cheeks started to feel warm. ''I.. uuh..'' I managed to mumble quietly before giving up and sighing instead. My eyes flickered down to my feet but went back up to meet his as he chuckled softly.

''I'm not going to scold you.'' He flashed me that gentle smile that made my heart throb. ''I'm sure you had a good reason to be out this late.'' He continued softly, the smile remaining even as he finished speaking. My body relaxed again and I apologized with a smile. A comfortable silence fell between us and lasted until Jan looked out the window with a sudden interest. My gaze followed his with curiosity but I couldn't figure out what he was looking at.

''It's gotten cloudy…'' His voice was just a whisper beneath his breath. His eyes remained at the dark sky for a moment before they returned to mine. ''Shall I walk you back to your room?'' He asked with a smile and I gave him a soft nod. I was thankful for the darkness in the hallways, I would have been even more embarrassed if he had seen how flushed my face was.

We walked through the empty hallways in a comfortable silence until he suddenly slowed down before stopping completely. He stood in front of the last big window in this hallway and his attention went to something outside. I stood beside him, seeing as we were five steps away from the door to the servant quarters, it seemed like he didn't want to leave yet. Or so I hoped.

''Jan?'' I softly called his name while I watched his face, searching for a reaction. When he started smiling, I looked out the window as well. ''Oh!'' I gasped and took a step closer to the window. The bag in my hands was left in my left hand as the right went up and touched the cold glass with care.

''It's snowing.'' He smiled softer than usual, if that was possible, and didn't move his gaze.

''It's beautiful.'' I murmured softly, almost mesmerized by the soft looking and white snowflakes, slowly falling from the sky with graze. I looked at the scenery as I heard him say a low ''Yes'' behind me and my eyes suddenly met with his in the reflection. I caught my breath and hesitated, was he really looking at me? It felt as if my heart had stopped while my lips formed his name but no sound came from me. I watched him smile and take a step closer to me before I turned around. His soft, gentle and purple eyes made me melt slowly as I looked up at him.

''I have to admit… I was lying earlier.'' He spoke calmly and tilted his head ever so slightly to the side, making him look apologetic. The soft light of the lamppost outside allowed me to see his face in the darkness. His cheeks had a faint red color and I started to think that he was as nervous as I was.

''Lied? About what?'' I asked, slightly surprised by the amount of hesitation and worry in my own voice.

''You weren't in your room so I figured you had to be in the work room.'' His soft smile widened. ''And I came looking for you.''

I stood there, completely dumbfounded, heat instantly appearing in my cheeks and not a single word would form in my head.

''I'm sorry if this surprised you.'' His voice was almost the same, except for the faint hint of disappointment in it. His eyes fell down, ''I didn't mean to-''

''No!'' I blurted out, surprising both of us and making his eyes return to mine. ''Uh… I mean… I'm surprised but not in a negative way.'' I awkwardly explained and huffed when he softly chuckled. At least he was smiling again. The warmth in my cheeks lingered there while I noticed his had the same delicate look. I smiled calmly, so much for it being a bad decision.

''Really? I'm glad.'' His voice was normal again, maybe a bit gentler, and his warm eyes didn't leave mine again. A short silence fell between us as we merely smiled at each other shyly before our eyes fell down. ''I… I know it's a bit early to give you this…'' He spoke softly while his hand reached for something in his pocket. My eyes followed his hand and widened when he pulled out a small package. The wrapping was pitch black and had a red bow around it. I smiled big without realizing it and reached out with both of my hands, temporarily forgetting about the bag in my left hand. My heart raced as I gently took it from him. ''I won't have much time around Christmas as Prince Joshua requires my help with planning the Christmas party. So I wanted to give it to you now instead of later.''

''Jan… I don't know what to say.'' I looked up at him with a big smile and flushed cheeks. ''You shouldn't have…'' I mumbled and suddenly remembered the bag in my hand. ''Oh… Um, actually, I have something for you as well.'' The warmth in my cheeks made me self-conscious and I felt my voice shake faintly. ''I didn't have time to wrap it because I only just finished it.'' I spoke while giving him the bag and kept my eyes down in embarrassment. Still, I looked up as the bag rustled and watched as he pulled out the black scarf I had knitted for him. ''I saw you outside a couple of days ago. You weren't wearing a scarf and since the weather will only get worse, I wanted to make this for you.'' I nervously glanced up at him, slightly panicking when a reaction wasn't clear on his face. ''I only recently learned how to knit. So it's not perfect… You don't have to wear it if you don't like it…'' I tried my best not to sound disappointed as my eyes fell down again and I felt my mouth dry up.

''Thank you, it's perfect.'' His voice made me look up at him again and I was instantly struck by his heartwarming smile. I felt the disappointment vanish and I smiled softly while I watched him try it on. It was big enough for him to wrap it around his neck two times and thick enough to keep him warm. His eyes found mine and my skin started to tingle softly. ''This will definitively keep me warm.'' He smiled big and honest, making my heart skip a beat or two. When he started to take it off, I remembered the gift in my hand.

''I'm glad you like it.'' I smiled embarrassed and my eyes fell down on the small gift in my hands. My fingers slowly removed the ribbon and then gently took of the wrapping, revealing a little black box. My glance went up out of surprise and easily found his, which was full of anticipation, and stayed like that until he gave me small nod with a smile. My glance fell down again, watching as I opened the small box and I gasped softly. ''It's beautiful.'' I almost whispered and studied the necklace. It was made of silver but had a darker color to it. The heart pendant was the same dark colored silver and brushed, so it wasn't flashy. I looked up at him with a big smile. ''Thank you. Can I put it on now?''

He looked at me with gentle eyes and nodded softly. ''Here, let me help.'' He smiled and carefully took the box out of my hand. ''Turn around.'' I did as I was told and turned around. I watched him in the reflection and caught my breath when he put the necklace around my neck. I reached my hand out to move my hair over my shoulder but stopped when my fingers brushed against his. A shiver ran down my spine and my hand retreated. He made a soft sound and I secretly watched him using the reflection again. He smiled gently as his thin fingers moved my hair and then proceeded to close the necklace's lock. I met his eyes for a second and looked down quickly, hoping he hadn't noticed that I was watching him. ''Thanks.'' I mumbled while my fingers carefully touched the pendant before I turned around with soft smile.

''It looks good on you.'' He smiled while his fingers went to touch the necklace as well. My skin tingled as his fingertips brushed against it and I kept my eyes down. He made a soft sigh before his fingers moved; now softly tipping my chin upwards. I didn't object and quickly found myself getting lost in his gentle eyes. The smile was still on his lips as his fingers moved again, carefully brushing some stray hairs away from my face before settling on my cheek. I felt my heart beat faster and blood pumping in my ears. I couldn't move or look away but in reality, I didn't want to do either of those two things. I slightly opened my mouth, wondering if I should say anything but the thought quickly left my head when his lips softly pressed against mine. I closed my eyes and quickly responded to his soft and gentle kiss, ignoring my rapidly beating heart as it felt like it was beating against my ribcage. His hand moved to the back of my head and his fingers intertwined themselves in my hair. Our lips parted long enough for us to take a quick breath before they were pressed together again. My hand grabbed his jacket before my mind went blank and I forgot about everything else than the sensation of his lips on mine.

When we parted, I couldn't tell how much time had passed but I felt slightly dizzy and out of breath. I kept my eyes closed until I felt his hand move, brushing against my cheek before disappearing. His face was as flushed as mine and I couldn't help but smile because of that. We stayed silent until our eyes met and he cleared his throat softly, almost as if he was embarrassed. His glance went up and I quickly followed it.

''Mistletoe…'' He hummed softly as we looked at it.

I hadn't noticed it until now. ''Oh…'' I murmured and felt a little stab of disappointment. I looked back at him when he suddenly moved, once again pressing his lips against mine. The kiss was quick and gentle but a kiss nonetheless. He drew away as quickly as he had kissed me.

''It's getting late.'' He sounded calm but his breathing was still as quick as mine. I gave him a weak nod and watched as he smiled softly. ''Goodnight.'' He smiled before starting to make his way down the hallway. I watched him as he left, a slightly confused but happy feeling spreading through my body. I couldn't help but smile faintly and my fingers went to wrap themselves around my necklace. My eyes fell down but moved back up when I heard his footsteps come to a halt. My eyes met his. ''Normally, you would only kiss a person once under a mistletoe…'' He said with a gentle smile before he started walking again.

The smile on my lips widened and as the sound of his footsteps faded, I turned around. I watched the snowflakes fall and waited for my breathing to calm.

The followings weeks were busier than I had imagined. Everyone struggled to prepare for the Christmas party and I found myself swamped with work. It was my job to prepare the outfits for the royal family and it was keeping me as busy as everyone else was with their assignments. Despite the busyness, the castle was full of life and people who were looking forwards to Christmas, so almost everyone was working with a smile on their face.

It helped a great deal, seeing everyone with a smile on their face as they hurried down the hallway. I clumsily carried the three rolls of fabric in my hands, struggling not to drop them as I hurried down the hallway, just like the rest. Something caught my eye outside and I came to a stop. It was as if the pressure and the people around me vanished for a second while I gazed out the large window. It was snowing again. I sighed deeply and it felt as if this was the first time I had really relaxed in the last couple of weeks. My mind drifted back to the memory of the evening, which still somehow felt like yesterday, the sensation of his soft lips on mine and the gentle smile he had worn. My eyes closed while I allowed myself to get lost in the memory.

My eyes opened again when the memory didn't end like it usually did and I felt the warmth rise to my cheeks. Now wasn't the time to think those kinds of thoughts. I gently shook my head before taking one last look at the white scenery outside. I caught my breath for a second before smiling again when I noticed him. He was standing there, looking up at me, smiling, with snowflakes in his brown hair and wearing the scarf I had given him. The cold had given him that lovely line of red across his cheeks and his breath turned into a white cloud. We smiled at each other until he broke eye contact by looking over his shoulder. I noticed Prince Joshua behind him and for a second, his eyes met mine. His eyes seemed to flicker between me and Jan and then, it looked like he realized that we had been looking at each other. His eyes went back to Jan when Jan started to walk towards him. Judging by the white clouds forming, they were discussing something as they started to walk off.

I watched them go and readied myself to leave as well. Just as I was about to take my first step, Jan looked over his shoulder for just a second, his eyes meeting mine with a warm gaze. Seconds later, he turned and I did the same. We returned to our duties with a smile lingering on our lips and warmth I couldn't describe. My fingers would have touched the necklace if it wasn't for the rolls of fabric in my hands and I fought the urge with a small smile. This was probably the first time I couldn't wait for Christmas to be over…


	2. Snowflakes part 2

The large ballroom had fallen into complete silence. The fact that it had been filled with people, laughing and dancing, only an hour ago, seemed forgotten. The large chandelier in the middle of the room had been turned off, leaving the dim lights along the walls to provide enough light for people to see. They barely managed to do so though. Their soft light only reached somewhat halfway into the room, leaving the center darker than the rest.

My gaze went outside, watching the already white scenery, and smiled when I noticed it was snowing again. I let out a soft sigh before returning to my assignment. Most of the servants had gone home to their families to celebrate Christmas and I was one of the only ones who had stayed. I had given a hand at the Christmas party, playing the small part as a waitress and now I was helping clean up, collecting the different glasses left by the guests. I carefully sat the tray with down on the table closest to the door, before leaning against it. My fingers found the first button on the white shirt I was wearing and didn't hesitate to undo it, revealing the necklace previously hidden away by the fabric. The outfit I was wearing had been given to me because of this party and I had to say, I liked it. The black skirt, white shirt and with a black vest was definitively different from my usual clothes. The rest of tonight's staff had worn the same outfit as well.

I let my fingers pull out my hairband and felt how my hair fell down before my hand ran through it with a sigh. When I heard the door creak beside me, I quickly stood up straight.

''I was hoping you would still be here.'' A soft voice appeared from the door and I relaxed a bit when I recognized it.

''Oh, it's just you, Jan. I just finished.'' I smiled at him, watching him as he moved to stand next to me and sat two plates and two glasses down on the table. I eyed them curiously and couldn't help but laugh softly when I saw what it was. ''You brought cake and champagne?''

''What's Christmas without cake?'' He smiled back and we both leaned against the table. He was wearing a different outfit tonight to fit in more during the party. The white shirt and black vest looked good on him, along with a pair of black pants and shoes. I felt my cheeks turn warm before looking away. ''Is your feet okay?'' He asked with worry clear in both his voice and expression.

''They're fine… I'm getting used to heels.'' I smiled before closing my eyes and leaning my head against his shoulder. ''You know, this is the first Christmas I didn't spend at home.'' I hummed while enjoying his warm shoulder.

''Really? Do you regret not going home?''

''No. They seemed pretty happy that I stayed and helped out. Besides, it's not every day you get experience a royal Christmas party.'' I smiled and looked up at him.

''Did you like it?'' His soft eyes met mine.

''Yeah. It was really something else. I've never seen so many beautiful dresses in one place before and people looked happy as they danced. It really looked like something from a fairytale.'' I spoke while my gaze went around the large ballroom, recalling the images of people dancing, laughing and drinking. The soft music roaming through the room from before was playing in my head and almost seemed real. I sighed softly and felt his hand move over mine. I looked at him again and realized how close his face was to mine. I caught my breath.

''Have you ever danced like that before?'' He asked while his fingers intertwined with my own and his gaze held mine.

''Once. But that was a while ago and I'm really not a good dancer.'' I smiled slightly embarrassed and felt my cheeks warm up again.

He let out a soft chuckle before standing, gently bringing me with him as he was still holding my hand. ''Can I have this dance?'' He brought my hand to his lips and gently kissed it before looking at me with his gentle eyes.

I felt my whole face warm up. ''J-Jan… I… I'm really not good at dancing.'' I stuttered, slightly panicking. ''And there's no music… you can't dance without music.''

''It's fine…'' He spoke before pulling me closer to him, ''just follow my lead and I'll take care of it.'' His voice had reduced to a sweet whisper in my ear and I felt myself melt completely. His hand appeared on my hip as we reached the center of the room and I swallowed hard. I was about to object again when he suddenly moved and I instantly forgot about it. His hands led me across the floor, easily leading me as he made me twirl and caught me again. He brought me close to him again and I felt myself at a complete loss of words. They weren't needed anyways.

I couldn't tell how long we danced. It felt like an eternity but I loved every second of his. His hand in mine, guiding me around with elegance I didn't know I had and then softly bringing me closer to him again. My eyes were locked with his until he gently leaned me backwards. I got his hint and grinned to myself as I let myself slowly lean backwards, trusting him completely.

As he brought me back up to him, I couldn't help but laugh softly, ''you're a really good dancer. Where did you learn this?''

His eyes met mine again while he softly smiled. His hands were keeping me close to him and I felt my heart flutter because of it. ''Really? Thank you.'' He smiled before bringing me slightly closer to him, ''I guess I've picked up a few things the last years. You learn a lot by attending these parties on a regular basis.''

''Oh…'' I was able to mumble shortly before his lips were on mine. His arms moved around me and gently pressed me against him with a soft sound. I sighed when your lips parted and the warmth of his hand appeared on my cheek. ''I've missed you…'' I whispered while keeping my eyes closed. His warm breath hit my lips before he gave me a gentle kiss.

''That makes me very happy to hear.'' The smile on his lips could be heard in his voice as he spoke. He kept his face close to mine. ''Just as happy as seeing you wearing this.'' His fingers brushed over my collarbone before touching the necklace and I felt myself shudder. He chuckled softly while his fingers stroked some of hair behind my ear before returning to my cheek. ''Shall we have some cake?'' I gave him a small nod and his hands led me back to the table.

His hand didn't let go of mine before we reached the table and he handed me one of the plates. ''What kind of cake is it?'' I asked with a smile while accepting the plate.

''It's a French chocolate cake. You like chocolate, right?'' He smiled softly while watching me take my first bite.

''It's delicious!'' My voice was more eager than first intended and he chuckled softly. I felt my face warm up and frowned a bit. ''Yes but how did you know?''

''You're quite easy to read.'' My puzzled look made him smile tenderly. ''The first fitting…'' he started but trailed off when his eyes focused on something. His thumb was suddenly wiping something away from the corner of my mouth. I froze and felt my cheeks burn as he brought his thumb to his mouth. ''I brought chocolate and sweets along with the tea. You never touched the sweets, only the chocolate. Dark chocolate seems to be your favorite.'' He smiled and took a small bite.

I must have looked as stunned as I felt since the smile on his face slowly faltered. Then, a second later, it looked like he understood what was going on and his cheeks got a bit of color. ''You had some frosting…'' He murmured, clearly flustered, and his eyes watched me with hesitation.

''You surprised me…'' I cleared my throat softly. ''But thanks…'' The smile appeared on his lips again and we both relaxed again. ''I like sweets as well but I've always had a weakness for chocolate, especially the dark kind. Was it that obvious?'' I asked somewhat hesitating and furrowed my eyes brows slightly.

''Not at all, you have to remember that people expect me to notice these kind of things.'' He smiled reassuringly. ''Besides, isn't it natural to notice something like that when you like the person?'' His eyes fell down while speaking but I couldn't take mine of him. His cheeks turned slightly red again as he looked up. A nervous flicker played in his soft eyes while he looked at me. ''I would like us to be more than we are now.'' His voice was small and nervous but determined and serious. His hand found mine and quietly held it while he was looking at me, waiting for an answer.

The second I smiled, the nervousness on his face faltered. ''Jan.'' I gently squeezed his hand. ''I would like that as well.''

The amount of relief on his face and the smile on his lips made my heart skip a beat. ''You're already making me very happy.'' He murmured softly while using his hand to pull me close enough for him so catch my lips with his. The kiss was quick and gentle and it left us both smiling when our lips parted.

''I do my best.'' I snickered and reached for my champagne glass. The light and bubbly drink was a nice contrast to the chocolate cake. ''Now I'm definitively glad I didn't go home.'' I quietly said to myself but noticed how he softly nodded.

''Yes, I am too.'' He softly smiled and brought his champagne glass next to mine.

I smiled back and gently tapped my glass against his, listening to the sound echoing through the empty room. It had been a while since Christmas had been this good…


	3. Fireworks part 1

''Wood?''

My eyes followed my fingers while they worked, making sure the needle was placed correctly and that all the details were correct. ''Yes?'' I murmured while keeping my eyes focused.

''Wood.''

''I'm not trying to be disrespectful to you by not looking up, but I need to finish this now.'' I did my best to sound calm and respectful while continuing my work. If I wanted to finish the deadline, I had to finish these adjustments today. ''You're usually not the chatty type, my prince, is anything the matter?'' I asked while quickly allowing my eyes to look up at him before returning to my fingers.

He was standing straight, his arms crossed across his chest and with that displeased expression he usually wore. ''Jan is smiling a lot lately…''

''Jan is always smiling.'' I softly answered while placing one of the last needles in the pants.

''It's different…'' he paused and he shifted slightly, looking down at me, ''I can't help but think it has something to do with you.''

His sentence startled me enough to mess up. I uttered a short ''ow'' beneath my breath and sat up. I had successfully stabbed my finger with one of the needles, drawing blood.

''I don't get what he sees in you.'' Prince Joshua scoffed while watching me with a raised eyebrow.

I pressed my lips together to keep myself from saying something and merely smiled, ''I'm done, be careful when you take them off.'' I spoke while standing up and making my way to the door. ''Please leave the pants here and I'll have someone bring them over later.'' I smiled politely and opened the door but was stopped when I was about to walk out.

Jan stood in the doorway, showing the same surprised expression as me. ''Oh, I didn't know you were the one to do the fitting.'' His soft smile made one appear on my lips as well.

''It wasn't planned, so you couldn't have known.'' I smiled softly, already feeling a bit of color appear in my cheeks.

''Jan.'' Prince Joshua's voice called out behind me and I felt my body stiffen. ''Is it because of her, you asked for the day off?''

I watched Jan's expression flicker for just a second, annoyance appearing on his face before it returned to his normal and calm one. ''Ah, you quite ruined my surprise there, your highness, but yes, it is.'' He smiled.

I felt my heart speed up as he spoke and my mouth went dry. ''Jan, you really-''

''As I just told her,'' Joshua interrupted me sharply and walked up behind me while speaking, ''I don't get what you see in her.'' His hands appeared on my shoulders and turned me around. His sharp eyes dug into mine before he started studying me closely.

''Your highness-'' Jan started, discomfort and slight anger clear in his voice, but Joshua interrupted him.

''I thought you had better taste than this.'' He muttered while his fingers grabbed my chin, turning my head side to side before making me look up and meet his intimidating eyes again.

''Your highness!'' Jan nearly shouted, voice slightly shaking with different emotions, but his try fell to deaf ears.

''She's hardly worth spending time on… She's not that pretty either.'' Joshua continued and completely ignored Jan.

''That's enough!'' Jan yelled while his hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back to him. Joshua's fingers disappeared from my chin and I found myself being pressed against Jan's chest. ''I'll be back in just a second, your highness.'' When he spoke again, his voice was mostly back to normal but the anger remained. He moved without waiting for a reaction, hand grabbing my wrist as he walked out the door and pulling me along. As he pulled me out of the room, my eyes met with Joshua's for a split second. I felt my cheeks burn when I noticed that he was smirking.

Jan didn't stop walking before we had turned a corner, then he turned around, hands grabbing my shoulders while his concerned eyes found mine. ''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell like that but he….'' Jan's voice died out as he watched me. His hands moved, gently framing my face as he watched me.

''I'm fine. I'm more worried about you.'' I hummed softly, enjoying the feeling of his hands.

''I'll go back and apologize, it'll be fine.'' His voice was soft and he smiled bittersweet. ''I guess he ruined my surprise as well but I was hoping that you'll be free tomorrow.''

''You want to spend New Year's Eve with me?'' I asked with a smile.

''Well, now that you asked so nicely…'' He grinned while leaning in closer.

''Did you just trick me?'' I grinned back, his breath hitting my lips.

''Depends on how you look at it.'' He hummed before closing the small distance between us with his lips.

''I guess that's a date then.'' I smirked after our lips had parted.

''Good.'' He smiled. ''I'll come by and pick you up tomorrow then.''

''Deal.'' I grinned.

He kept smiling at me while I slipped out of his embrace and I started walking back to my room. I listened to his footsteps walking away from me and around the corner. Anticipation started to turn my stomach into a knot and the smile on my lips wouldn't disappear. I already knew I wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight…

I stood in front of the mirror, watching my own defeated expression. My dark brown curls fell down my shoulders, just like they did half an hour ago. I sighed heavily, I still couldn't figure out what to do with my hair. I felt ridicules and pushed myself away from the sink, walking out of the bathroom and over to the small dresser, where I had all of my clothes. I pulled out the first drawer and couldn't keep a small smile back as I picked up the cream colored lace dress. It was the only dress I had brought with me when I took the job and now I had a chance to wear it.

Three knocks on the door pulled me away from my thoughts. ''Just a second!'' I spoke while quickly putting the dress on and stepping into the black high heels I had. The heel wasn't that high, so they weren't a problem to walk in. I hurried to the door and opened it with a smile.

''I hope I'm not too early.'' His soft smile made me calm down. ''You look beautiful.'' He stretched out his hand while watching me with those tender eyes. He was wearing black pants and a white shirt.

''No, the timing is perfect.'' I smiled and took his hand, closing the door behind me. ''Thank you.'' I felt my cheeks redden from his compliment. His hand brought me closer to him before he started to lead me down the hallway. ''Where are we going?''

''I'm showing you my quarters.'' He tried to sound calm but I could tell how nervous he was. His hand squeezed mine softly and I looked up at him with a small smile.

''You're nervous.'' I spoke softly while intertwining my fingers with his, 'it's not like you.''

''I'm always nervous when you're involved in what I'm doing, especially now where I'm hoping to impress you tonight.'' He smiled like always before stopping in front of a door I had walked past many times. ''We're here.''

''Wait… wait, impress me?'' I furrowed my eyebrows, ''you don't have to do that…'' I paused, now noticing the door. ''Your room is here? I thought-''

''That it would be in the same hallway as yours?'' He smiled softly as he interrupted me. ''If the prince needs me, I have to be close by, so my room is in the same hallway as his.''

''Okay… okay, still, I just want you to be… well, _you_ tonight…'' I mumbled, still standing there with furrowed eyebrows.

He chuckled lightly while pulling me closer to him. ''I'm not good at being anyone else, so you don't have to worry about that. I do have a favor to ask you though.''

''What?'' I asked while relaxing a bit again.

''Close your eyes.''

I looked at him with a skeptical glance but ended up sighing and closed my eyes. His lips pressed against mine for a second before I heard the door click. His hands appeared on my shoulder and gently pushed me forwards, when they left my shoulders I took a sharp breath and the door clicked behind me again, this time closing. I felt his presence behind me, breath ghosting over my skin, almost teasingly, as I waited for him to tell me to open my eyes…


	4. Fireworks part 2

''You can open your eyes now…'' His soft voice whispered while his breath hit my ear, making me shiver softly. I did as he said and slowly opened my eyes. My eyes first fell upon the small table, which was neatly set for two, a bottle of wine and plates filled with different kinds of chocolate and fruit. ''Do you like it?'' His soft voice appeared again and his lips brushed against my ear.

I took a sharp breath, ''I like everything you do.'' I smirked and listened to him chuckle lowly. ''Still, this is really too much.'' I smiled. His hands slipped from my shoulder before one of them found my hand and gently pulled me forward.

''Really? I think it's just right.'' He chuckled softly while I watched his free hand pick up a piece of chocolate and bring it to my lips. His eyes locked mine and I quickly felt warmth rise to my cheeks. I opened my mouth and accepted the chocolate, savoring the bitter but still sweet taste.

''You're spoiling me.'' I sighed softly but smiled. He chuckled softly again while his hand left mine, now occupying themselves with opening the bottle of wine and pouring two glasses.

''Perhaps… is it a problem?'' He asked while handing me one of the glasses with an almost teasing smile.

''Never said that, I was merely stating the obvious.'' I grinned before taking a sip and looking around.

His room could be described with one word; gorgeous. It was at least twice the size of my room, maybe even a bit bigger, and even had a balcony, facing the city. All of the furniture was made of a type of dark wood and all in the same design. I took another sip before I noticed something was missing in the room. As gorgeous as it was, it didn't look like he had lived here for very long. Anything slightly personal, like photographs, was nowhere to be seen in the room.

''Jan?'' I hummed while turning around. ''How long have you had this room?''

''Around three years now, I think.'' He spoke while pulling one of the chairs out, gesturing for me to sit on it. I didn't hesitate to sit down and waited for him to do the same. ''Why are you asking?''

''Oh, it's nothing, I was just wondering.'' I smiled. It was rude to bring up, wasn't it? He probably had a reason for it anyways. I reached for another piece of chocolate but stopped when I noticed how he was looking at me. My glance went up and I met his slightly serious one.

''Lena… you just scanned my room and you're not the type who asks a question without having a meaning with it.'' He smiled softly while watching me with an interested glance. ''So, why did you ask?''

I watched him for a bit, taking a small sip before exhaling and softly smiling again. ''You know, I somehow really like how easily you can read me…'' My glance fell down while I spoke but it went back up to his when his hand gently held mine on the table. My smile returned as well. ''I was just wondering why you don't have any photographs around.''

''I don't have anyone to have photographs of.'' His voice was normal, just like the look in his eyes and on his face, but there was something wrong right beneath the surface. His smile faltered just a bit, definitively proving that something was wrong. ''I'm an only child and my family isn't that big. Plus I'm not on good terms with my parents, so I guess that really narrows it down.'' His smile was bittersweet and his glance fled mine as he spoke.

I blinked a couple of times before moving, quickly standing up and grabbing the chair. He looked when he noticed my moving around and watched me as I pulled the chair next to him and sat down again. I grabbed his hand with both mine and pulled him closer. ''Sorry, I shouldn't have asked.'' I hummed before kissing the corner of his mouth.

He chuckled softly before leaning closer. ''Its fine. I could have told you something else if it had been a problem.'' He watched me as he kept close to me. I felt my cheeks go red as he continued to watch me silently until he sighed and smiled. ''Why don't we change the subject to something a little more cheerful? It's New Year's Eve after all. ''

''Of course.'' I smiled. A small wave of relief hit me and I felt my body relax. The last thing I wanted was to have this night ruined. ''How do you usually spend New Year's Eve?''

He seemed to relax as well and I quietly noted that questions about his family were banned for the rest of the evening, unless he himself brought back the subject later. Sitting close, we each told how we had spent our previous New Year's Eves, either with family, friends or in Jan's case, with other servants or helping out at the royal parties. We agreed on this being the best one so far.

It seemed like we both lost track of time, talking and laughing while we finished the bottle of wine and the plates were being thinned out. The atmosphere was light and definitively more cheerful than before. Maybe it was because of the wine, which also had left us with slightly red cheeks and perhaps a bit braver as well. We sat close while feeding each other as the sound of fireworks suddenly appeared. Time had definitively slipped away from us and it seemed we were both aware of it as we looked at each other with the same look.

Jan's glance fell down on his wristwatch and I watched how he grimaced before getting up. ''I completely forgot to keep track of time.'' He sighed before walking up to his desk, where a bottle of champagne was kept on ice. ''Would you mind opening the doors to the balcony?'' He looked over his shoulder and gestured at the door. He smiled at me when I nodded and then returned his attention to the champagne.

I got up, slowly pulling the curtains away and revealed the glass doors behind them. I smiled when I noticed the fireworks on the dark and clear sky and didn't hesitate to open both doors. A cold breeze quickly reminded me that it was still winter, easily making me shiver.

''I have a jacket you can borrow, it's on the bed.'' It was like he read my mind. I turned around just in time to see him opening the champagne. The sound startled me slightly nonetheless and Jan let out a small chuckle. I felt my cheeks redden when I realized he was chuckling because of me. ''You're cute.''

''Oh stop it.'' I breathed, obviously embarrassed, and quickly busied myself with retrieving the jacket he had referred to. It was a black blazer I had never seen before but it I was certain that it would suit him well. I listened to him pour the champagne while putting on the blazer. The sleeves were too long, so while walking back to him, my hands worked on rolling them up to a more fitting length. ''Are you sure you won't be cold?''

''I'm fine, thank you.'' He looked at me and handed me one of the glasses while smiling softly. ''We still have a few minutes before midnight.'' His arm moved around my shoulders and gently led me outside with him. His arm stayed there, even as we got outside. He checked his watch before smiling softly at me. ''Two minutes… I'm glad we made it.'' He spoke close to my ear before softly pressing his lips against my cheek.

''Sounds like we have perfect timing.'' I smiled while turning around and sneaking my arms around him. His sent reminded me of tea and chocolate and it only made my smile widen. His arms moved around me and gently pulled me into his embrace. He gently kissed my forehead, making me look at up him with a smile. One of his hands moved, settling against my cheek instead.

''Have I told you how cute you are?'' His voice was as soft as his fingers on my cheeks.

''Yes, but I do like to think that I'm too old to be called that.''

''What do you want me to call you then?'' He smiled softly while his fingers followed my jaw line, stopping at my chin and gently holding it. ''You're beautiful.'' His voice was only a whisper while he leaned closer to me, his breath hitting my lips. Instantly, all warmth rose to my cheeks and I felt my face burn like it was on fire. This made him chuckle softly while he slightly tilted his head. ''I love your reactions, they couldn't be more honest.'' He hummed low before closing the small distance between us. The kiss was gentle and sweet, like his kisses always were, but as I felt both his hands on my cheeks, he suddenly deepened the kiss. My hands gripped his shirt as I gladly accepted this sudden change. When our lips parted long enough for us to breathe, both our breaths had quickened and his cheeks had turned red as well.

''That was… new.'' I huffed softly, keeping my eyes down while I tried to calm my breathing down. My heart was racing like crazy and the fact that fireworks suddenly started to go off close by, dancing across the dark sky, didn't help it slow down.

''Sorry… I guess I got a bit carried away.'' His voice was soft as he spoke before shifting around. Automatically, my hands loosed the tight grip on his shirt and let go completely when he moved. He moved behind me, putting his arms around my waist and gently pulling my back against his chest. His hot breath hit my neck.

My eyes drifted to the sky, watching the fireworks while I placed my hands on top of his. ''Don't apologize.'' I breathed as he adjusted his position, resting his head on mine. ''I liked it… a lot, actually.'' The wine was definitively making it easier to say things that would have been too embarrassing to say while sober. I felt him tense up as I spoke, probably out of surprise, and he took a sharp breath.

''So, if I kissed you like that again, you would be glad?'' I couldn't keep a shiver back when his voice snuck into my ear, almost as if he was teasing me.

''I'm glad whenever you kiss me, touch me, smile at me. I'm glad when we have a conversation and when you show me how thoughtful you are. So I want ask for much else than you doing what you want to do and be who you are.'' I spoke while keeping my eyes on the sky and felt how he relaxed while I was speaking.

He let out a small sigh. ''I'm quite positive that you just made my heart stop for a second or two.'' I could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke. I felt my heart flutter as he kissed me behind my ear. ''Would you stay with me here tonight?''

I caught my breath and felt how my heart sped up. I wanted to turn around and see his expression but his grip around me tightened, stopping me from turning. ''Jan.'' I felt his grip loosen, allowing me to turn around this time. It was pretty obvious why he didn't want me to turn around. His face was redder than I had ever seen before and his eyes quickly fled from mine. I smiled softly; he looked so embarrassed it was adorable. ''Jan. Please look at me.'' He looked at me like he was a child expecting to get scolded. I let my hands move up and gently touch his cheeks, hoping it might make him relax a bit again. ''If you wouldn't have asked, I would've asked myself.'' I felt my own cheeks warm up while I spoke but the smile remained on my lips.

He looked at me with surprise but it was soon replaced by something softer and a smile appeared on his lips. ''Really?'' He hummed while leaning closer to me. ''I really am a lucky man.'' He grinned shortly before gently catching my lips with his.

When we drew apart, it seemed like we both agreed on what should happen next. We moved inside, closing the glass doors behind us, and my fingers found the light switch while his lips were occupying mine. The light from the fireworks lit up the room in a random pattern, leaving it to our hands to find and feel everything. His behavior surprised me a bit but if was definitively in a positive way. His careful and gentle nature had been switched out with a more passionate and eager one. My hands busied themselves with his shirt buttons while I felt his run through my hair before framing my face. He took a sharp breath and shuddered softly when his shirt had been unbuttoned and my hands touched his bare skin. Just then, enough light fell from outside for me to see how flushed his face was. If it was possible, the sight made my heart beat even faster.

I pulled his shirt of his shoulders, letting it fall down on the floor before his hands carefully pulled my dress off. It joined his shirt on the floor, quickly followed by our shoes and his pants. His hands grabbed my hips and softly led me backwards until we reached the side of the bed. I lost my balance when I bumped against it and fell down on it. Jan took it as an opportunity and leaned in over me, catching my lips with his. His hand moved beneath me and his deft fingers made short work of opening my bra and letting it join the other clothes on the floor. I closed my eyes when I felt him move and his hot breath hit my bare skin. I shuddered slightly when his lips placed small kisses from my collarbone and down, stopping between my breasts.

''J-Jan.'' I uttered his name in a mixture between a whimper and a moan when he started kissing my breasts. I tossed my head back before I let one of my hands run through his hair, softly moaning. His hand moved down in the meantime, not hesitating to remove the last piece of clothing on me. I took a sharp breath and accidently pulled his hair out of embarrassment. I knew it would be impossible for him not to notice how obvious my body was reacting to him. ''Sorry.'' I mumbled with a burning face.

''Am I going to fast?'' He asked softly before moving back up to me.

''No, no… Of course not. I was just a bit embarrassed.'' I mumbled the last part and the burning feeling in my cheeks remained. I took a deep breath, hoping to calm myself a bit before I moved. I pushed him to the side before sitting on top of him. I heard him groan in surprise but his hands quickly gripped my hips before he moved himself into a sitting position. I groan back in annoyance before attacking his lips with hunger. I wanted him to lie down. I wanted to do something for him for a change, spoil him like he always spoiled me. His hands moved down, disappearing from my hips, and I felt them move beneath me. When he had removed his boxers, he leaned back, anticipation in his eyes and a faint glow of red across his cheeks. His breathing was quick while I felt his hands appear on my body again, slowly running up my sides before moving down my back again, settling on my hips.

When I let my hand move down and gently wrap my fingers around his length, his hands tightened their grip and his fingers dug into my skin. As soon as my hand moved, he let out a low moan and shuddered softly. I felt my pulse quicken just by watching him react and hear the sounds he made. I bit my lip softly, letting my hand move a bit faster, making him moan my name which made me let out a soft sound. I couldn't wait anymore and adjusted my position slightly before starting to lower myself down on him. This time, both of us moaned. My hands settled on his chest and felt how his muscles moved and just how quick he was breathing. Then I started moving my hips.

''Oh god.'' I breathed while leaning my head back. His fingernails dug into my skin as I moved and I listened to the mixture of sounds we were uttering. I felt my blood rush through my veins and a thin layer of sweat was starting to form but I didn't care. My hands gripped the sheets as I moved my hips faster and I could feel him struggle not to move beneath me. This definitively went against his nature, only receiving without giving anything back.

It didn't last long before he gave into his nature and sat up. I was still moving my hips when his lips hungrily found mine. His hands left my sore hips and moved up my sides again. One moved itself around my back, giving me support, while the other found my breasts. I moaned against his lips, allowing his tongue to find its way into my mouth. Every kiss was heated, deep and passionate in a way I had never experienced but that, his hands and how perfect we could move together, made my mind go blank.

I let out a loud moan while leaning against him, pressing my forehead against his shoulder. I let my teeth sink into my bottom lip while I slowed down, hoping it might bring me down a bit and away from that edge. I didn't want it to end yet. I took a breather but it turned out to be a short one. His hands pushed me down on my back and before I could react, he was leaning in over me again.

''Now it's my turn.'' His hot breath hit my ear as he whispered in between quick breaths. I threw my arms around his neck when he started moving with the same speed I had reached earlier. I couldn't keep my moans back as my mind went blind again and my nails dug into his back. He moaned low before desperately pressing his lips against mine. I gave into him instantly, giving up on trying to last any longer as he seemed think that as well. He pushed me closer to the edge each time he moved his hips and his hot breath went against my skin, but it was all too much when he kissed me hard. I felt my body shudder before it tensed up and I let out a loud moan while tossing my head back. My muscles tensing around him did the rest for him and I felt him shudder as well.

I lay there breathless and feeling like a complete mess. I waited until my breathing had calmed down before moving, trying to untangle myself from the sheets and him, but he quickly stopped me by pulling me closer to him.

''Let's just stay like this.'' He whispered, sounding utterly spent, before lazily kissing my cheek.

''Mhmm…'' I hummed while snuggling closer to him, giving into exhaustion and closing my eyes.

''Good.'' He hummed back, gladly letting me move closer to him.

I managed to smile softly before dozing off.

The early morning sunlight easily found its way into the room and it woke me up earlier than I liked. As soon as I had opened my eyes, I squeezed them shut again. The buzz from the wine and champagne from last night had worn of and turned into a more uncomfortable feeling and left me with a dry mouth. I slowly sat up, spending a few seconds being confused about where I was before I remembered everything. I felt my cheeks burn within matter of seconds, memories still vivid in my head.

A soft sigh beside me stole my attention and I looked down, instantly smiling softly. Jan was still sleeping, almost looking like a child as he lay there with ruffled hair. I watched how he furrowed his eyebrows shortly before he relaxed again, muttering something in his sleep.

I carefully moved of the bed and sighed softly when I noticed the mess of clothes on the floor. I rubbed my forehead, clearly too tired to find what was mine. I grabbed his shirt and noticed my panties close by, grabbing those as well and judged that I didn't need more than that. As I got somewhat dressed, my hands quickly retreated when they came close to where Jan had had his hands last night. I looked down and spotted red marks on both sides of my hips, instantly making my face burn when I realized what they were from. I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts.

I walked to the door, where he had earlier explained that behind it was the kitchen, and carefully opened it before walking in and closing it behind me. I instantly started to look for coffee and let out a small and happy sound when I found it. I didn't waste any time and quickly started making enough for both of us.

My eyes closed on their own as I leaned against the kitchen table, listening to coffee maker groan under its current task. I must have been tired enough to doze off since I didn't notice Jan enter the small kitchen, not until he moved his arms around my shoulders and pulled me close.

''I didn't know you could sleep while standing up.'' His voice was slightly hoarse and low. Maybe it was because he had just woken up but it was more likely because of what we had been doing last night.

I wondered what my own voice would sound like.

''Didn't know that either.'' I spoke, instantly realizing how my voice was in the same condition as his. I swallowed; I should have made tea instead of coffee.

''I have to say, my shirt really suits you…'' He whispered in my ear and I let out a sigh when his hands moved down my sides. Despite how pleasant his hands were, they still made me utter a quiet groan when they touched my sore hips. His hands disappeared instantly. ''I'm sorry… I didn't mean to-are those…?'' His voice trailed off after his hand had lifted the shirt a bit.

I turned, meeting the sight of Jan only wearing pants and with hair that looked like he had just been out in a storm. His face was flushed and his eyes shyly met mine. ''Turn around.'' His expression turned into a more puzzled one but he did as I asked. My face flushed instantly and I cleared my throat. ''I… um, I seem to have done the same… to you…'' I mumbled while looking at the red marks on his shoulder blades. I sighed before leaning forwards, pressing my forehead against his back. ''Sorry.'' He hummed softly before turning around again and putting his arms around me. I leaned my face against his chest and closed my eyes.

''Lena?''

''Mhmm?'' I hummed.

''I love you.''

I smiled big before looking up, meeting his kind eyes. His hands cupped my cheeks gently and he leaned a bit closer. ''I love you too.'' I whispered and watched him smile sweetly. He closed the short distance between us and gently pressed his lips against mine.

The coffee maker started beeping behind me, making us stop and laugh softly. He gave me another quick kiss on me forehead before pulling me closer into his embrace. As we ignored the beeping behind us, I couldn't imagine a better start on the new year than this…


	5. Your Wide Eyes Are My Favorite Place

I could still hear the heavy rain as I ran barefoot down the hallway. My clothes were dripping on the floor as I ran silently, hoping I would make it back before making too much off a mess. When I finally spotted the door, I let out a soft sigh and hurried inside and quickly closed it again. I shook because of my drenched clothes and didn't waste much time and trying to get it off. I cursed at the shirt buttons but quickly forgot about them when I heard the door to the balcony open and close and looked up.

''Jan?'' I breathed, still being out of breath.

He was drenched as well but at least he wasn't wearing his uniform like me. His hair stuck to his skin and raindrops fell from the tips. The rain had given him slightly flushed cheeks which reminded me of the look he would get whenever he was doing, well, other things…

I felt the well-known feeling of lust settle in my chest and my pulse quickened.

''You're back early…'' He smiled a bit hesitant and I knew something was wrong.

I frowned slightly, letting my eyes run down his frame to check for anything unusual. I didn't have to look for long.

''Is that…?'' I mumbled and moved closer to him hesitantly, keeping my eyes on his chest. The flush on his face deepened as I got closer and I felt him get nervous.

''Well, the rain… I couldn't just…'' He stumbled across the words but gave up upon explaining further when I stood in front of him.

''It's a cat…'' I smiled, looking at the small creature who was hiding beneath the wet fabric of his shirt, ''It's cute.''

He smiled and let out a small breath he had been holding. ''I don't want the prince to know, but I couldn't leave him out in the rain.''

''He was out on the balcony?'' I asked with a soft smile while my fingers gently touched the kitten. He was as wet as we were. ''Poor thing.'' I mumbled and listened to him purr.

''Actually… I found him out in the courtyard.'' Jan chuckled sweetly while his hand went to bring out the kitten from his hiding spot beneath his shirt. ''Can you hold him while I get a towel?''

''Sure but why don't we let him stay in the bathroom… I mean, it's the warmest room here plus if something happens, they won't see him.'' I asked as I followed him to the bathroom.

''Good idea, bring him here then.'' He smiled at me while he opened the closet where the towels were placed. I gently placed the kitten back into his hands and watched how he carefully let it down on one of the towels. ''This should be soft enough.''

We stood still and watched the kitten make himself comfortable on the towel, curling together like a ball and looking pleased. I smiled softly while I let my hand find Jan's and intertwined our fingers. He turned his head and our eyes met. He was still wearing that tender smile as he looked at me before leaning closer. I closed my eyes and met his lips halfway with my own.

''We're going to catch a cold.'' I mumbled as he led me back into the main room, closing the bathroom door with his foot.

''We don't want that.'' He breathed next to my ear and I shivered when his hot breath hit my skin.

Our hands worked in unison, removing the other's wet clothing, while our lips stayed locked, only interrupted as we included our tongues. Shortly after, all of our wet clothes lay in a messy heap on the floor. We stopped out of it, making our way to the bed while our hands mapped the other's body, even though they already knew every curve, scar and soft spot. His low moans could still send shivers down my spine and drive me mad, lusting for more of him.

My back hit the bed and I let out a soft sound as he was hovering in over me. His lips moved to me neck, knowing exactly where he should run his tongue over my skin to make me moan.

''J-Jan…'' I whimpered softly and nudged him with my knee.

He let out a soft chuckle while letting his lips meet mine again and adjusting his position. When he got comfortable, he penetrated slowly and carefully and we both let out a soft moan. I swung my arms around his neck, pressing him close to me as he started rolling his hips. We quickly established a slow but slightly hard rhythm while we leaned our foreheads together, panting heavily.

''I love you. I love you so much.'' I breathed against his lips while one of my hands went to touch his cheek tenderly.

''I love you too.'' He whispered between his ragged breaths and gently kissed me.

His hands ran up my body, one stopping at my breasts and gently started massaging it while the other continued up to the hand on his cheek. He pressed my hand down against the mattress as he needed support and we let out fingers intertwine again.

We didn't need anything else than the intimacy and the gentle kisses we shared nor did either of us try to last longer like usually. It was perfect as it was, slow and gentle, intimate and tender. Tonight, that was what we needed the most and we happily gave in to the other, seeking their lips like out life depended on it but with a tenderness that felt like kissing snow, the softness melting away on your lips.

I arched my back upwards when I climaxed, bringing us closer together, and his lips pressed against my neck before it was just his breath as he moaned. He followed me shortly after and his lips softly appeared on mine again. He rolled onto his side but his hands brought me along with him and I quickly snuggled up next to him. Our legs intertwined like our bodies did in the sheets as we rolled around again, lips pressed together like a pair of teenagers who were making out.

My hand settled on his chest to feel his heart beating as our lips drew apart. We both took a mouthful of air before smiling and his hand appeared on top of mine. His fingers spread apart; easily showing how much bigger his hands was than mine. His expression was exhausted but the smile on his lips was still present and tender as always.

''We should really hang up the clothes so they can dry.'' I smiled and closed my eyes when his other hand started stroking my hair.

''I won't let you get up, so you might as well forget about it.'' He whispered when I moved the slightest.

''Like I would be getting up anyways.'' I grinned and used my free hand to tug the duvet, letting it cover the most of us. ''Nothing could get me out of this bed right now….'' I hummed after leaning my head against his chest.

He chuckled softly and we started talking about what we had done that day as we relaxed in each other's arms. I enjoyed being in his embrace, listening to him talk and having his scent so close to me. I couldn't keep a smile away from my lips as we continued talking until we fell asleep.

My eyelids fluttered softly as I woke up from my heavy slumber. I squeezed my eyes shut again before yawning and softly stretching as I sat up. When I opened my eyes again, I let my glance fall next to me. Jan was still sleeping like a child next to me and I smiled tenderly before lying back down and snuggling up next to him. His arms closed around me out of instinct and pulled my naked body closer to his.

''Good morning.'' I breathed and kissed his cheek softly.

He let out a soft sigh before slowly opening his eyes. ''Good morning.'' He hummed softly with a slight grin, ''what time is it?''

''It's still early, the alarm hasn't gone off yet.'' I mumbled before kissing him on his lips.

He hummed something low before kissing me back and continued to kiss me tenderly. We stayed in the bed until the alarm went off, arms wrapped around the other while we shared small kisses, all tender and soft. I grabbed his shirt from last night from the floor and put it on before slipping out of the bed. I stretched again and smiled at him as he got out as well. When he had found his boxers and put them on, he disappeared into the kitchen to make coffee, like always.

I watched the kitten peek around the corner from the bathroom before I suddenly came running instead. I smiled and went to open the balcony door. The kitten glanced up to me before running outside and easily making its way down from the balcony. It wasn't that high up, so the kitten had no trouble jumping onto a tree and then further down on the ground. I closed the door with a soft smile and turned my attention to the messy bed.

I hummed a soft melody as I made the bed. It had been 6 months since we had started being together and summer was getting close. I had moved into his quarters after his schedule got busier so we could still see each other on a regular basis and I had to say, everything between us was going better than I had ever imagined. It would never call something perfect but it was as close to it as it could possibly be. The staff had definitively noticed as well and they seemed to be happy for us.

I was about to place the last pillow when I suddenly stopped. I felt my stomach turn and I covered my mouth with my hand before closing my eyes. I tried to relax but when my stomach did another turn, I knew what was going to happen and quickly fled to the bathroom. I barely managed to slam the door shut with my foot before I emptied what little stomach content I had into the toilet. Tears pressed on because of the uncomfortable feeling and I took a deep breath.

''Lena?!'' I heard Jan's worried voice call out from the other side of the door, ''are you alright?''

''I'm… I'm fine….'' I spoke and flushed before pushing myself away from the toilet and taking a breather. I opened the door with a heavy sigh. His worried eyes quickly found mine.

''Want me to call the doctor?'' His voice was hesitant and still worried.

''It's nothing.'' I showed him a weak smile but it didn't change the look on his face.

''It's the third time this week, are you sure?'' He asked while his eyes studied my face and his hands went to frame it.

I sighed against his gentle hands; I knew there wasn't much point in trying to discuss it with him. If he wanted me to go, he would make me somehow. The man could control the stubborn prince so I was nothing compared to that.

''Fine… I'll see him after my fitting session with the prince.'' I sighed as he smiled before gently kissing my forehead.

''Thank you.'' He breathed and his eyes found mine, ''the coffee will be ready in just a second, why don't you get dressed? I'll pour you some…'' He spoke while his hands found mine and our fingers intertwined naturally.

''Thanks.'' I smiled and gave his hands a slight squeeze, ''what would I do without you.''

''Hmm, you'd probably still have trouble making your way around the castle.'' He snickered, teasingly referring to when I got lost several times during my first month here.

''Oh please…'' I grumbled but couldn't keep my smile hidden when he kissed my forehead again, ''now you're just teasing me.''

''Perhaps…'' He smiled before his hands let go of mine and he made his way back to the kitchen, ''I know I would be lost without you.''

I stared at him, feeling my face flush and my heart skip a beat or two. He looked over his shoulder with that tender smile I loved so much before he vanished into the kitchen. I shook my head while turning around, heading back to the bathroom so I could get dressed.

I knocked three times on the door before letting myself in. The prince was already waiting for me and he was currently reading a newspaper. I excused myself and closed the door behind me.

''You've been here before time the last month or two. I suspect this has something to do with you moving in with Jan.'' Joshua dryly commented from his seat and put his newspaper down. He was already wearing the outfit he had to try on.

Despite his tone, I was still smiling. ''That's probably true.'' I smiled and started to write down what I had to change on the shirt. After writing them down, I started to place the small needles so it would make my job easier later. We were both quiet as I worked in a steady pace but as I finished the shirt and went to do the same to the pants, he spoke up again.

''I can tell, you know.'' I looked up at him in confusion. ''That he's happy, I mean… his smile is different.'' He continued and kept looking straight ahead. ''It's obvious to see he's in love.''

I felt my face flush and I awkwardly cleared my throat, ''r-really? Well, I'm happy you can see that.'' I moved my glance back to what I was doing and waited for my body to calm down again.

''Hmm…'' He hummed before falling silent again.

I was close to letting out a relieved sigh but kept it at bay as I knew he would hear it. With a burning face, I continued working but quickly came to a stop shortly after. I sat up straight as I felt the familiar feeling of my stomach tuning again.

Oh god no…

''What's wrong?'' He asked flatly with furrowed eyebrows but I kept still.

''I…'' I breathed and my body started to tremble as I fought the urge to throw up, ''I have to…''

''You have to?'' He asked, now sounding annoyed, ''What? You forgot something?''

I knew this would go wrong no matter what so I made a decision and stood up. ''I'm very sorry for this.'' I quickly spoke while hurrying out the door and grabbing the nearest thrash-bin I could find before I gave in.

''Miss? Are you alright?'' A woman asked shocked behind me before rushing over and grabbing my shoulders.

''Wood! What do you think you're-'' Joshua's voice came to a sudden stop when he realized what was going on. ''Get her to the doctor's office and someone find Jan.'' he sighed before I heard the door close.

I shut my eyes tightly in embarrassment; this was turning out to be a rather bad day.

''When did you start feeling sick, miss Wood?'' The elderly man studied me through his thick glasses before returning his gaze to the papers in his hand.

''Um… Around… two weeks ago I guess.'' I mumbled while letting my fingers fidget with my shirt.

This was my first time in the doctor's office and despite him looking like a nice old man, doctor's had always creeped me out. He had made me sit down in a thin, wooden chair, across from his large desk made of dark wood. He himself sat in a large, heavy leather chair, looking so small in it at almost seemed comical. His eyes were still hidden behind his thick glasses as he looked me over, slightly humming. His glance fell back down on the papers in his hands, remaining there shortly before moving to the ones scattered on his desk. Then, he lout a soft sigh, leaned further back in his chair and tipped his head down a bit so he could look at me without the glasses.

''I see. Was it always like this?''

''No. Until a week ago I was only felling a bit unwell during the mornings, then last week I started throwing up.'' I felt my pulse quicken as I started to get nervous.

''Hm…'' He let out a soft hum while his glance fell back down on the papers. He spend some time looking at the pages before his gaze returned to me again. His glance shifting about was only making me more nervous. ''Are you sexually active?''

''Excuse me?!'' I gasped and felt my face beginning to burn, ''what does that have to do with anything?''

''Well, you could be pregnant.''

My mouth went dry as I simply stared at him in chock, my mind going blank. ''I-what?'' I swallowed hard, ''pregnant? But I'm on the pill, I can't be…'' my voice was small and unsecure.

''It's not a 100%, miss. It's been known to happen accidently.'' His glance stayed on me and he watched me look down, still in utter shock. ''Do you want me to test you?''

I somehow managed to nod.

Some hours later, I had trouble keeping track of time, I was back in our quarters and had been sitting on the balcony since I had gotten back from the doctor. The kitten had showed up again and I had spent my time entertaining the adorable little fur ball. My thoughts were settled on trying to find a way to explain everything to him. Jan still hadn't come back from the business he was attending in town and the longer he was gone, the more I was starting to dear his reaction. Even so, when I heard the door open and close, I didn't move. I watched the kitten disappear somewhere before standing up.

''Lena?'' I closed my eyes when he called my name. He was out of breath and quickly appeared next to me, gently taking my hands with his. ''One of the maids called me and she told me what happened. Are you alright?'' His voice was as worried as I had ever heard it and it calmed me a bit.

''It's… I'm okay…'' I had to swallow because of my dry throat but I still showed him a small smile. I watched him calm down and one of his hands stroked my cheek tenderly.

''That's good, I was really worried. I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner.'' He smiled faintly and gave me a soft kiss. ''Did you see the doctor?''

I nodded faintly.

''Did he say what it was?''

I squeezed my eyes shut again before wrapping my arms around him and pressing my face against his chest. His arms gently embraced me while one of his hands started stroking my hair, ''hey, it's okay…'' his voice was soothing and helped me gather my courage.

''Jan…'' I paused to take a deep breath, ''…I'm pregnant.''

I felt him tightening his grip around me while he stayed still for a few moments. ''Are you… are you sure?'' He breathed.

''The doctor checked, so yes…'' I mumbled and waited for his final reaction.

It came quicker than I had anticipated as I suddenly felt him pick me up and spin me around with him. ''That's… That's amazing!'' He laughed before kissing me softly but passionately.

''Wait… You're… You're okay with this?'' I asked in utter confused and stared at his happy smile.

''Why wouldn't I? The woman I love is carrying my child, what man wouldn't be overjoyed because of that?'' He smiled and kissed me again. Then, his smile suddenly faltered as a sudden realization hit him, ''unless you're not….'' He spoke as he put me back down on my feet.

The mix of emotions on both our faces made it hard to find the right answer but in the end, I smiled. ''I would have liked to have waited a few more years but I was more afraid of your reaction.'' This brought a smile back on his face and his lips to find mine again.

''I don't care if it's now or later, as long as it's with you, I'm ready for anything.'' He whispered softly before continuing to kiss me tenderly.

My heart fluttered because of his words and I couldn't stop myself from smiling against his lips. Despite his overly positive reaction, I was still feeling conflicted about this. Was I even ready for this? To be a mother? My glance fell down but I looked back up when his fingers tipped my chin upwards.

''You look nervous. Mind telling me what's wrong?'' He asked while his fingers moved to stroke my cheek.

''I just can't stop wondering how this will go… I mean, what if I'm no good with kids?'' I frowned while speaking and put my arms around myself, ''it's so surreal…'' my voice had turned into a low mumble and I cast my glance down again.

''Lena... look at me.'' He was smiling softly when I looked up at him. ''listen to me,'' he started and let his hands frame my face, ''you're great with kids. Remember when you watched the chef's daughter during the last party?''

''That was one afternoon…''

''Darling, you're going to be a great mother. I know it, so have a little faith in yourself…'' I looked back up at him, ''also, it's a combined effort.'' He chuckled softly and I felt myself starting to smile. ''That's it.'' He smiled and leaned closer to me.

''I really don't know what I should do without you.'' I whispered before his lips settled on mine.

My hand moved to my stomach as we kissed, thinking about what would happen the next year and that I was actually calm about it. Maybe it was because I knew he would be by my side during this and after, but nonetheless, I was looking forward to experiencing this with him.

But… how should we tell this to the people in our lives?


End file.
